SS: Daily Life in the Shoes of TinierMe Staff
by The Knight of Heart
Summary: Being a part of TinierMe Staff isn't as easy as you thought it might be. From the never ending battle against trolls, racking their brains for new clothing styles, to everything in between. Lets just say, they weren't really prepared to face this.
1. Meet The BANHAMMER

** Hello guys! Its Leafdapple from Tinier Me. This was just some random plot bunnies. This story will not be updated regularly. This is Crack. Pure Crack. If you want something with decent plot, go somewhere else. Really. The SS, stands for Short, Shorts if anyone was wondering =3=**

**I don't own Tinier Me. (I wish)**

Selfy and Piyokko walking down the paved path to the Chat Rooms, was a pretty common sight. The passing banter between them ranged from the Selfy Town Stock Market (Yes they have that), to caring about their cute little chibi pets, who were dutifully following them. Other Selfys stopped talking long enough to say hi, or give a small wave to the passing pair.

Reaching the chat rooms, both of them started giving small glances at the room names, hoping for none of those dreaded... well you should know by now. From trading, to boredom, and everything in between, things were going well.

"Nothing yet Selfy." Piyokko said cheerfully.

"Hopefully, they will be none" Selfy replied in a monotone voice.

"Why do you sound so glum right now Selfy?"

"I just remembered that I have to give out an interview for this newspaper. And if you must know, I hate giving out them."

"Why not just dump it onto TinierMe Support (TMS) then? Tickets have been coming in slower anyway. 3 times I found him asleep on his desk with no tickets."

"He'll get mad at me."

"I'll take the blame", Piyokko said rather mischievously.

"Okay what are you planing?" said Selfy glancing at another nameplate as they walked past.

"Nothing"

"Really?"

"Yes", she replied in an overly sweet voice.

"I'll just hope its nothing too bad."

"It won't be!"

Selfy ignored the last comment and went on ahead with her job. Duty. Or something. Heck she gets paid so whatever. Glancing at yet another name. She stopped. It clearly read $ex BL Only.

Piyokko popped up next to Selfy and sighed.

"Can't they think of better names than that? I mean why not use the word brothel or something? It sounds-"

"Uh... Piyokko?"

"-way better too. I mean use some creativity here-

"Piyokko!", Selfy said, giving her best friend a shake.

" What..?"

"Stop giving Selfys even more ideas!"

"No one can hear us! I think."

Both of them stared around the hallway seeming as if something was listening to them. The walls said nothing in reply. Selfy then took out a small pink hammer she l lovingly nicknamed, THE BAN- HAMMER.

"So how do you want go get in?" Piyooko asked. " The doorknob is jammed."

"Pretty simple."

And with that phrase, Selfy swung THE BAN-HAMMER with surprising force into the door. It splintered almost immediately, deep cracks forming, and with a crack it toppled over. What greeted them was not something you might expect.

Scratch that. It was something you might expect coming into one of these rooms. There were how should I say... Selfys... In a rather compromising position. Both were staring at Selfy and Piyooko wide-eyed as they stepped through what was once a solid door.

"If you wouldn't mind, please get dressed" said Selfy closing her eyes slightly. Piyooko did the same. At least that was what Selfy thought.

Both red faced, the two selfys that were caught red-handed got dressed, and were standing in front of them. Taking a small. but thick book, Piyooko stepped up to them and began in a professional voice much unlike her usual squeaky one.

"4.3 Online Conduct. Part (3) You agree not to transmit or facilitate the distribution of Content that is harmful, abusive, racially or ethnically offensive, vulgar, sexually explicit, defamatory, infringing, invasive of personal privacy or publicity - uuff!"

She was pushed aside suddenly by Selfy, waving her hammer around like a madman- er woman. Two cries of pain later, along with an annoyed Piyooko lay two selfys laying on the floor with X's on their faces. **(X.X)**

"You know you didn't have to hit them right? All you had to do was tap them with that and all would be well."

"You were boring me. Plus I wanted to hit something. Would you rather be the one I hit?"

"Fair enough."

**~~~~~A few hours later~~~~~~**

TinierMe Support (TMS) was fast asleep on his glass desk. His breaths misting the surface, while a few scrapes of paper on his desk fell to the floor as he tried to move into a better position. A small knock on the door sounded. Then another. Then another until the banging was louder than the time he accidently walked into Selfy's room while she was undressing. But that was an another story.

Groggily, he waked up and walked to the door, opening it.

"Whats..you need?"

"TMS, TMS!"

He was greeting by a flury of paparazzi taking photos of him and shouting questions in his ears.

"TMS is it true that your dating Selfy?"

"I heard the reports, but-"

"Move out of the way! I need some photos-"

"Sweetest story-"

"Guys", said one young journalist. "He fainted."

With some grumbling, they left trying to find some more info on this sweet story. TMS lay on the floor in a dead faint.

**Foop.**

**Should I write more shorts? I find it fun to write about TM staff xD**

**I like reveiws =3=**


	2. Grape Juice

Hello again ^^ Here's another chapter for you guys! More reviews, faster I update :U

**~~~~~~~~~LD~~~~~~~~~~**

Monday night was always quite a busy time for the Staff of Tinier Me. With the rush and millions of the eagerly awaiting Selfys, sometimes the stress was far too much for the team. They only had a team of six, maybe a few more if their Sponsors popped in to help them.

Looking into TM Staff office, it wasn't that hard to imagine chaos. Papers littered the floor, along with some pieces of what appeared to be glass. Purple spots stained the crisp white carpet. Chairs were propped in every which way, while the rooms six inhabitants were scattered throughout the room laying in some of the weirdest positions available.

How did this happen you ask? I'll tell you.

**~~~~~~~~~LD~~~~~~~~~~**

It was Sunday night, and all six of the staff were getting ready for the HTML coding that awaited them.

Clapping her hands together, Selfy announced "Well its almost time Selfys! Do we have everything prepared?"

"Basic coding, completed." replied Zuzu.

"New item designs, completed!" shouted Ylfa.

"Almost done with TM shutdown." replied TMS, while his fingers were gliding across a keyboard.

"Perfect! Now all we need is for it to run without a hitch!"

"When has that ever happened?" Heavygrinder asked.

"Never, sadly." Selfy sweatdropped.

"Hey guys!" came a cheerful voice from their kitchen. "I brought some juice to celebrate!" Walking out with seven glasses of what appeared to be grape juice, she handed one to each of the Selfys, and kept a glass for herself.

"Piyokko, I thought we were all out of juice? Where did you find this?" Selfy questioned.

"I just found it. Lets have a toast!"

"To our newest gatcha, Night of the Vampires! Cheers!" replied TMS.

"Cheers!"

The tinkle of glass against glass echoed in the room. Selfy was daintily sipping her juice, as if it was fine wine, Heavygrinder drinking hers in large slurps. TMS got a straw for reasons unknown and starting sipping. Zuzu and Ylfa were challenging each other to a drinking contest, while Piyokko drank hers in one gulp.

"Hey, this is pretty good. Can I get some more?" TMS asked.

Replies of "Me too" and "what about me?" sounded across the room.

"Sure!" Piyokko took everyone's, now empty glasses and refilled them with a bottle.

Not really caring whose glass was whose, they all took a random glass and gulped all of it down. Chants of "More!" came out again.

"Shessh, guys let me get another one." Stepping up, she trudged to the kitchen and came back with six bottles.

"Here!" came out her speech, now a little slurred.

All six of them lunged for the bottles. Two immediately fell to the floor and broke, spilling their dark purple contents into the white carpet. The other four were now being fought over by six selfys.

"Give me it!"

"Its mine!"

"Shaddap! I'm older than you!"

"Its fucking mine!"

Selfy got ahold of one and began chugging down is contents. TMS fought valiantly for it, but ended up being knocked unconscious by her pink BAN-HAMMER.

Zuzu stole two bottles, but ending up tripping and smashing them into Heavygrinder's face. Tripping on Zuzu, Ylfa fell face first on the glass table, which immediately shattered. Koko also got hit with the BAN-HAMMER, and fainted.

Selfy finished drinking the bottle, and tried to side-step TMS, trying to get the last one that was lying on the carpet. Sadly she ended up tripping on her own two feet and landed onto TMS back. Her vision getting funny and her brain turning into complete mush, the last thing she saw before she entered the darkness of sleep was a label that read,

"**Portuguese port (fortified). Property of Sugizo. Touch and die."**

**~~~~~~~~~LD~~~~~~~~~~**

**I had waaayy. Too much fun writing this xD This was the reason why the updates were late :3**

**Please review :D**


	3. Sweet Sweets Pt 1

Leafdapple here again ^^

**Thanks for the reviews, they make me happy :D**

On with the chapter~ I also do not know if eating low sugar helps you lose weight. I made this up =n=

**I do not own Tinier Me. Nor Pocky. Nor anything food related here. If I did, I would be rich XD **

**~~~~~~LD~~~~~**

The day finally arrived. After two months of an agonizing, strict low sugar diet, the selfys of Tinier Me staff rejoiced at Selfy's announcement that the diet was officially over. TMS was especially happy. Giving up coffee for two whole months led him to fall asleep on his desk where support tickets piled up night after night. The only thing that kept him awake was the fear that Selfy would slap him. (Selfy slapping you was close to being hit with her equally, if not more terrifying BAN-HAMMER. It isn't a nice feeling.)

Heavygrinder only sighed in response. She'll miss having not to deal with sugar high selfys. Things were much easier in the office when Piyokko and a few others weren't hoping around like jackrabbits, getting their noses into everyone's business and tripping them up.

Selfy and the other female selfys, who started the diet in the first place, grinned happily after their announcement. They managed to shed a few pounds and could now fit in their skinny, skinny jeans.

A loud ringing sounded, coming from Selfy's light pink cell phone, complete with a mini gloomy bear accessory. The screen glowed a pale pink, as a small picture appeared on the screen. A photo of a selfy about the same age as Selfy, only she was wearing a hat, which looked like it was made from chocolate.

"Hello?" answered Selfy.

"Oh, Hi! What is it?" said Selfy pacing around the office. "Sure, we would love to! We have time right now. See you in a few!" And with a click, she ended the call.

"Cloud has invited us to come to her shop! But remember, don't get sugar high." The latter was told to Piyokko and the twins (Zuzu and Koko) with a small glare.

Cloud was a young selfy that just moved to Selfy Town. She was a pen pal to Selfy and they exchanged letters every week. Cloud came to Town to open her own business, which quickly became a candy store, thanks to her love of all things sweet or sour. It has grown into one of the biggest shop—no store, with 1,000 square feet of sugary goodness.

"So how are we gonna get there?" asked Koko.

"Fly, Duh!" replied Selfy putting on her Glimmering Angel Wings.

With a small smirk, she said "Last one there pays for the sweets!" And with that, she opened a window and jumped out, her fellow selfys staring in shock, before quickly starting to put on their own pair of wings.

The TM staff office sat on the 21st floor of a building, so it didn't attract much attention when a selfy flew from out an open window.

Selfy grinned, her pink hair flying wildly across her face while doing complicated flips and twirls into the air. A flash of white that sped in front of her nearly stopped the pink hair selfy in her tracks. There was Piyokko riding on the back of Holy Messenger Michael. The unicorn/pegasus looked as happy as a pegahorn can. His white wings speeding towards Cloud's Sweets Shop. And there gripping Piyokko shoulders was a slightly harassed looking Zuzu; his eyes closed in what appeared to be fright. Heavygrinder flew over Selfy and looked back, sticking out her tongue with a wink.

Slightly annoyed at her friends' antics, she flew even faster, her wings lost in a blur of pink. Catching up to Heavygrinder and Piyokko, the three (not including an airsick Zuzu) raced off, getting closer and closer to the shop. They sped over Chibi Pet Garden, the keenest of the pets spotting them before they were gone in a blur.

Heavygrinder, suddenly unequipped her Black Demon Wings, and went into a free fall. Selfy flew down, trying to catch her, thinking something went horribly wrong. But no, it was just Heavygrinder screwing with her. She then held onto her necklace, a silver chain with a small white feather. With a small flash of white, she ended up speeding away, yelling " See you later!" on her pure white Archangel Wings.

Piyokko and Selfy ended up staring at her with a derp-y look in their eyes, before both agreeing to fly together and to help Zuzu, who seemed to have fainted.

"I kindda forgot he had a fear of heights" remarked Piyokko as they set down on a patch of grass near the sweets shop. Heavygrinder was already there, tapping her foot impatiently.

"If we're done, may we go in?" she said, waving her hand in front of the shop.

It was…well normal by Selfy Town standards. It was painted a bright blue with light pink glass for the windows. Nothing out of place in a town as weird at this. But one look through the windows, and everything else was wiped from their minds.

~~~~~LD~~~~~

Cliffy =3=

**You can slap me xD **

**It ended up being a bit too long so I split it up. Its supoose to be short, shorts anyway.**

**Please review ^^ **


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